Then: A Female Voice
Now: Voicemail
Remember when you could pick up the phone, dial 411 and get a real live person, someone like Ernestine from Laugh-In? Those were pre-cell phone days. Pre caller ID. Pre answering machines. Prehistoric, if you ask today’s younger generation.
Sometimes, I would call the operator just to find out the time or even the weather in another state. And then there was that all important emergency call. When the line was busy for hours at your best friend’s house and you just had to tell her about a new song you heard on the radio, you could have the operator cut in with an emergency. Now I know they can still do that, but with call waiting and text messaging, there probably isn’t must need for that service. And most people probably don’t know it still exists.
But what still does exist, is that need for human contact. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been stuck in a voicemail loop from hell.
With a cup of coffee at my side, a pen in hand ready to take down the needed information, I call, let’s say, the Gas Company. After a few rings the computer voice begins: “Please press one for English, two for Spanish.” I press one. The voice then says, “Hola Por favor, escuche con atención.” Already, I sense that I’m in trouble.
I start over. I Press one. “Hello, please listen carefully as our menu has changed. Press three if you are calling about your account balance. Press four if you are calling to add new services. Six if you’d like to speak to the sales department. Eight if you are experiencing a gas leak.” I press three only to end up back at the beginning of the recording. “Please listen carefully as our menu has changed.”
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I bang on the “O” until my index finger begs for relief. Until my brain is screaming for a “real” person. “Please listen carefully as our menu has changed!” By the time I get a real person, my coffee is cold and I’ve forgotten who I was calling and what I was calling about!
Sometimes there just isn’t ever a real voice. But those computer voices that repeat back to you what you’ve just said. Sort of. I say, “Housewares, please.”
The voice says “Okay…Mickey Mouse Ears? Is that correct?”
“NO! House…wares.”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t get that.”
And I don’t get you! Most often I just hang up.
And while I’m at it, I have another pet peeve. Answering machines that sound as if the person is really picking up the phone. “Hi…how’re you doing. We….”
I start talking “Hi. I’m good. How are you? I can’t wait to see you tonight.”
And then I hear the machine voice. “We can’t come to phone right now.”
So don’t I feel like an idiot having just had a heartfelt conversation with an answering machine!
I don’t doubt that some day our answering machines will be programmed to carry on conversations. We can be at a bar in Mexico drinking margaritas while some voice activated computer back at home conducts our business for us.
I just hope that mine understands how frustrating voicemail can be. Press one if you agree with my sentiments.
I’ve just pressed one, Janie–but I’m also frustrated enough to figure that I’m still not going to reach a real person with answers to why we’re subjected to this kind of silliness!
Linda – It’s crazy isn’t it? I’ve spent hours on the phone only to be disconnected at the end.
OMG, I almost had to leave the office to attend to my potty needs after reading your post!! Was sent here by your buddy and mine, Pam! She promised you’d have a good blog…she’s right!! I had something similar happen to me the other day whilst calling Time Warner. They had called and left a message telling me they were calling about my account. So I called back and I get the Time Warner regular recording, not Jessica, who left the message and phone number to reach her.
One of the queries was why I was calling and I had to answer back…I told the automated lady, “YOU CALLED ME!!” What else was I going to say?? I was then connected to a customer service person and the rest is history. After my discussion with Latania, I then received another call from said company and now they wanted me to take part in their survey; basically, wanting to know how good or bad Latania was via the phone. I was getting ready to leave and so I put the call on speaker while I was putting on my lip gloss…I gave Latania a 5, which is excellent, however, the automated person still couldn’t understand me, so I picked up the the phone this time and said, again, 5!! She still couldn’t understand me…asked me to repeat my self, by this time I was a bit on the irritated side at this point and I did a horrible thing, I yelled out again 5 with an expletive at the end! She then thanked me for participating in the survey and that ended the call!! Sheesh!!
Come on over to my blog and visit me…we have much in common as far as our rantings…I do that a lot!! Glad to have met you and look forward to reading more about your boomer life as I too am living dream!!!!!!!
Georgina
I usually try and do something else while I am waiting, and then you almost forget you have the phone in the other hand – lol! I am good at typing one-handed, or making tea, or running around the house picking up stuff. I think hanging up is healthier. 🙂 xox Pam
Georgina,
Thanks so much for your comment. I’m going over to Pam’s blog to see if I can find your link. If not and you read this response…please tell me your blog address.
Janie
Got sent here by Pam – and am so glad. Love the “mickey mouse ears” – that type of thing has happened to me SO many times. It’s my NY accent that really messes things up. “Dark Coffee” turns into “Dog and Coffee” – not a good combination. I could go on and on.
love your blog – keep it up.
Hi Mimi,
Thanks so much for stopping by. There are many more posts to come!
Have a great Sunday,
Janie
OMG! Getting a voicemail greeting that sounds like a live person is answering – that is one thing that will actually IMMEDIATELY make me see red!!!! That has to be one pet peeve that I have – I want to kill someone over that.
There is yet another. Some people assume that their callers want to listen to a particular song, and they play that song – sometimes ALL THE WAY THROUGH!! You can’t skip it, you just have to endure it. Thank God that most cell phone programs are unlimited now, b/c that is one way to really rack up cell phone minutes. Why should I pay to hear a song that YOU wanted me to hear?
But my NUMBER 1 is the live person thing!! I am ready to go ballistic whenever someone does that to me!!!!